hannah

Hi-ya all! Hannah is better now but it was like going through hell and back seeing her sick. After seeing the chirpy doc. She was ok for only one day. It was on Saturday night that her temperature rose up again. At 3am in the early Sunday morning, she was vomitting and crying and i felt her body was hot. I started sponging her and asked her to take her medicine. That sunday i told a friend that i would go and support her function which was at work and i didnt hesistate this time. I picked up the phone and sms my ride that i couldnt go and then i sms my friend. AFter that i took Hannah to the medical center and this time we saw the chirpy doctor again and this time her temperature was 40.2. This time around the doc didnt shoot me a piercing look but instead she looked at me with compassion. I think she was tired and her chripyness was wearing off. She changed Hannah anti-biotics and we went home with the new set of medicine. I took Hannah to work on Monday since there was no management meeting and replacement classes. I wanted to monitor her condition and i wanted to be there just incase if it got worse. She was alright. The next day, we sent her to the daycare and when i called during midday at the daycare center, they said that her condition was getting worse. We took her to the medical center again and the doctor wanted to admit her but after seeing our worried faces, he said let's take her blood again and do the test. We took her to take her blood. She was screaming and crying that my heart reached out to her. H and I were tired and we didnt get enough sleep since Hannah was sick, and seeing her cried and the way she begged me not to take her to the nurse because she didnt want the needle, somehow ripped my heart apart. I almost make a fool of myself of crying infront of the pack hall of the hospital. I wish i could give my arm so that she wouldnt have to go through the pain but i can't. So H had to be stern and then she called me and i hugged her while the nurse squeezed blood out of her little finger until it filled a tube. They did the test and changed to another anti-biotics and we went home. I was restless because i had to leave her on Wednesday till Friday. I didnt want to but we were short handed to manage the conference. I was one of the committee members and i had to be there. I broke down in my class thinking about her. A few hours before leaving for the hotel, i made up my mind to bring her with me. At least she'll be near. I got a few of the volunteers to take turns to take care of her while i work but i went up to see her during lunch time; to feed her and bathe her. On the 2nd night we were there, she got better. We extended our stay and she got better and better. Her appetite got better too. When she was sick she refused to eat or talked. Her weight plummeted to 12kg from 19kg before. She was skin and bones. Now she's better and it was a lesson learnt for me. I took it to heart when one of my collegues said that the reason she's sick was because i dont hug her enough. I was going for an alternative medicine when modern medicine has failed. My collegue gave me 'air zam-zam' and after finishing a bottle of the water, her body cooled down. No more fever. I was hurt but there were some truth in what she has said about me not hugging Hannah enough. I was away in Brisbane and immediately after coming back , instead of spending time with her, i was at work, immersing myself with work even during weekends. I didnt have time with her. Every clouds has a silver lining and even dark ones like mine. This is my silver lining. I hug her more, i talked to her more. I spend more time reading to her and i kiss her more. We do girls things together and she gets my jokes. She's talkative like before. I cooked last week and she ate quite a lot. After her lunch, she said down and rubbed her round tummy and said " oh goodness i am so full". She is sounding more and more like me. I found her using all the phrases that i used. The other day she said " Mummy, can i say something?" She was so serious that i was actually scared of what she wanted to say. Then She said " My friend has the same clip that you are wearing. It's very pretty mummy, justlike you". I love the conversation we are having. I wish i could record each and every one of it and stash them in a safe somewhere. So that when i am older and she no longer stays at home and has a family of her own, i couldview them one by one to see how my little girl has grown. I thank god for Hannah. She is my life. Love your children because they are God's gift and God has bestowed the trust on us to love them the best we can. See you later aligator! (David would replied " in awhile crocodile") I miss David and the whole moo gang.