I miss....

I miss my house. I miss my car. I miss driving and eating at mamak stalls. I miss my office. I miss teaching.I miss lepaking with my friends. I miss mom. I miss my sisters and my brothers. I miss going for my regular facials. I miss Vicky-my beautician. I miss going for my dopamine-induced hair wash- it’s such a stress reliever. I miss going for reflexology. I miss having my frapacino green tea on a warm day. I miss swimming at the Aquatic center. I miss going home to Penang. I miss having massages at Gurney Hotel. I miss eating Penang food. I miss eating all the kueh. I miss my bedroom. I miss getting text messages from my students. I miss cracking jokes and LOL with my colleagues. I miss my monthly outings with my girlfriends. I miss chatting with my students. I miss listening to my Ipod in the car while driving.I miss my car..oops said that already.


I have been missing a lot of things, rituals and people from home lately. Maybe because of this uncertainty that I’m facing right now that has resulted me to be like this. Missing home so much that if my heart got the best of me, I would have gone home…right now. But no…i’m not. I’m staying and facing these head on.


Besides, if I go home then I’ll miss all the magical rainbow sightings from our backyards. There are a lot of them and big, mostly 180degrees ones. I’ll miss my bus rides. I’ll miss walking for miles and miles without sweating. I’ll miss wearing all these stylish jackets that I wouldn’t be able to wear at home without sweating like a mad pig. I’ll miss my knee high boots. I’ll miss reading and writing. I’ll miss the new friends that I’ve made. I’ll miss the family time that I seem to have more than when I’m home. I miss spending time with Hannah. I’ll miss my chats with H. I’ll miss cooking nasi lemak and roti canai or cucuq badak. I’ll miss my well-behaved hair. I’ll miss walking with H and Hannah to the grocery store. I’ll miss speaking with the Kiwi accent.I'll miss walking with Hannah to school. I miss the weekly family outings to morning markets or the beach. *sigh*


I’m a wreck but I thank God that I still have hope and faith. So let me share with you the lyrics of the Fray..You found me. I am into this song right now. The lyrics are meaningful and they speak of being lost and bewildered. H and I talked about it the other day and it was kindda fun having his take on it. I thought it was about a love lost but then it’s not only that but more of admitting defeat and surrendering to the powers that be. It’s also about asking for guidance and faith during bleak times. Feel free to disagree with me..


So here it is…The Fray- You Found Me


I found God
On the corner of First and Amistad
Where the west
Was all but won
All alone
Smoking his last cigarette
I said, "Where you been?"
He said, "Ask anything".

Where were you
When everything was falling apart?
All my days
Were spent by the telephone
It never rang
And all I needed was a call
It never came
To the corner of First and Amistad

Lost and insecure
You found me, you found me
Lyin' on the floor
Surrounded, surrounded
Why'd you have to wait?
Where were you? Where were you?
Just a little late
You found me, you found me

In the end
Everyone ends up alone
Losing her
The only one who's ever known
Who I am
Who I'm not, who I wanna be
No way to know
How long she will be next to me

Lost and insecure
You found me, you found me
Lyin' on the floor
Surrounded, surrounded
Why'd you have to wait?
Where were you? Where were you?
Just a little late
You found me, you found me

Early morning
The city breaks
I've been callin'
For years and years and years and years
And you never left me no messages
Ya never send me no letters
You got some kinda nerve
Taking all my world

Lost and insecure
You found me, you found me
Lyin' on the floor
Where were you? Where were you?
Lost and insecure
You found me, you found me
Lyin' on the floor
Surrounded, surrounded
Why'd you have to wait?
Where were you? Where were you?
Just a little late
You found me, you found me
Why'd you have to wait?
To find me, to find me



Cheerios! Have a great week everyone!